changes

 Life is a series of constant change. The flower blooms. The tide ebbs. The sun sets. People walk in and out of our lives. People change. Things are never the same. I find much difficulty in dealing with these changes. I’m too sentimental for my own good. I like to keep remembrances of the past. The first card I got from my best friend. The first rose I received from a boy. And the list goes on and on (and my room looks like an old attic…smells like one too haha!). It really breaks my heart to watch people close to me walk out and disappear from my life. That’s why I really felt blessed when an old friend way back in high school whom I’ve lost touch contacted me again. He contacted me through friendster (thanks friendster…I owe you one). We met recently and the talked flowed like the beer we consumed. It’s funny to remember the past…the high school years…the classmates and the teachers. It’s funny & enlightening to remember who I used to be. I can’t believe that I used to be a bully hehehe Anyways, after that meeting I got to thinking…changing is not synonymous with losing. In a way i never changed.Yup I grew up but that person who I used to be is still very much alive in me. The years just add up. You don’t lose any in exchange for a new one. It’s like a tree with a new layer of ring each year. I’m still the spoiled 3 year old, the 14 year old rebel, the not so sweet 16 and the currently-experiencing-quarter-age-crisis 26 year old. All these persons are alive in each and every one of us. It only takes an old song, a forgotten smile, a smell, a touch, a place to wake up the persons alive in us. It’s really refreshing to realize this coz lately I felt lost within me. I felt like I don’t know myself anymore. That somehow I’ve lost the real essence of me. Thank you mat for letting me realize that I’m still the person I used to be albeit I’m wearing a different guise now.